Recipe for Match Day

1. Alarm goes off at 07:00
2. Mix equal parts champagne and freshly squeezed orange juice into a 40 ounce industrial strength thermos. Pack 20 dainty Disney Dixie cups so that:
a) to the untrained eye, I will appear to be harmlessly sipping orange juice
b) I can share my homemade mimosas with classmates who are in close physical proximity and we can all appear to be harmlessly sipping orange juice
3. Arrive at our Match Day venue at 08:00
4. Pick up my pre-ordered personalized Graduation Announcements. Having been forced to purchase a minimum packet of 25 when I really only needed 10, will try to convince more popular classmates they can be ghetto-fabulous by taking my extra announcements, crossing out my name, and inserting theirs.
5. Pretend to listen politely while our endearing taskmaster of a Dean gives his rah-rah inspirational speech to 150 soon-to-be graduating medical students, all chomping at the bit to find out where we matched. We need ativan 1 mg IM Q1-2h prn agitation.
6. At 09:00, the Match Day envelopes are distributed; a wave of frenzied ripping-envelope-open noises reverberates throughout the room, accompanied by shrieks of excitement and/or dismay…
7. …and I got my top choice!!!!! Goodbye La-La Land, hello Emerald City!