"You're contaminated!" says the OR nurse as my double-gloved fingertip accidentally wanders one centimeter south of the top surface of the operating table. She banishes me from the OR and I am relegated back to the scrub sink, destined to begin the elaborate scrub ritual once again. I start cackling inexplicably as I recall a streaming instructional video detailing the mysterious nuances involved in staving off contamination before surgery. You start with the requisite scrub brush, hermetically sealed in a little plastic package and permeated with the industrial cleaning solvent of your choice: povodine iodine, extra foamy soap, or the strange red stuff that resembles sweet & sour sauce. After scraping under each fingernail with the plastic stick, you scrub the tips of your fingers with the brush side (30 circular motions for each hand). Only then can you advance to the spongy side and start the serious scrubbing.
There is something uncommonly obsessive-compulsive about surgical scrubbing. Each finger has 4 planes, and each plane must be scrubbed 20 times. The palm of your hand has 3 planes, each of which must be scrubbed 10 times. Your forearm is divided into 3 parts, each of which is also scrubbed 10 times. Is the American Psychiatric Association aware that surgical scrubbing falls under the definition of compulsions as repetitive behaviors (e.g. handwashing, ordering, checking) or mental acts (e.g. praying, counting, repeating words silently) that the person feels driven to perform in response to an obsession or according to rules that must be applied rigidly?
I am tempted to make an anonymous phone call (handkerchief placed over my mouth in order to disguise my voice) to the Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder Police to turn these people in. For the sake of their mental health, of course.
"You're contaminated!" says the OR nurse as my double-gloved fingertip accidentally wanders close to the imaginary line extending from the sterile blue drape behind which the anesthesiologist is seated.
Bite me.
1 comment:
I can remember being similarly humiliated by a scrub tech during my third year surgery rotation. While part of such tech's vigilance no doubt arises from a sincere desire for optimal patient care, I couldn't help feeling that there were power issues involved, as well. While medical students are bound for the top of the health-care hierarchy, many techs will remain in their present subservient position. So for some techs, OR sterility presents a precious opportuity to wield power over their future superiors. Anyway, you captured the experience well. You can check out my blog at www.jamesmarroquin.com
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